The birth of a baby brings a challenging
time for new parents who wish to resume intimate relations.
Exhaustion sets in due to sleepless nights. Added duties and
worries about parenting increases stress. Women experience
dramatic physical changes after the birth.
It is still important that you keep your relationship strong.
One of the best gifts you can give your new baby is a solid,
loving, caring relationship between you and your mate. Your
times of romance and sexual intimacy are an important part of
the relationship that will support your child's future.
Things for men...
Help with baby duties and household chores. Your wife
will see it as a sign of affection and she will not be as tired.
Help her find time for a nap. She will be more
likely to be in the mood if she is not exhausted.
Give her a back rub. Most women love them,
especially after giving birth.
A break helps. Send her out to do what she enjoys while
you watch the baby.
Talk to her about how you feel so she knows. It
is not fair to her to be angry in silence, if you are feeling
rejected or if your needs are not being met, let her know in a
loving way.
Things for women...
Let your spouse know that he is still important. Men
often feel they have been displaced by the baby as the main
object of your affection.
Make time to be a couple on at least a weekly basis.
Even if it is only an hour of uninterrupted time
together.
For the both of you...
If you start having problems, seek professional help
immediately. Your baby needs you to love each other.
Make every effort to get away (or have the baby watched
elsewhere) for an overnight without the baby. Do this
after the baby can be left with a trustworthy sitter. Try to do
this within the first year. From 6:00 p.m. to noon the next day
will give you and your spouse sufficient time alone without
adversely affecting your infant.
Prepared by: Dr. Michele Gardner,
MD, Ob. Gyn.
Dr. Dennis Shelle, MD, Pediatrician, James E. Sheridan,
District Court Judge
© Copyright 1998 *
Marriages That Work, Inc. - Lenawee County *
P.O. Box 928 *
Adrian, MI 49221 *
February 21, 1998
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